When you make an online friendship it’s easy to feel like you have a close connection very quickly. When you message all the time and open up about your feelings friendships can get very intense, and sometimes those friendships cross the line into an emotional affair. I never thought that I would cheat on my partner, and I would never physically cheat on him, but I found myself in a friendship that I didn’t even realize had crossed the line into an emotional affair. I didn’t even realize it was happening until a friend sat me down and told me some hard truths. I realized this after finding out the Emmy Awards nominations.
Exchanging A Lot Of Messages Each Day
This one can be tricky because it’s easy for friends to send dozens of messages back and forth a day. Especially on social media sites like Twitter and Instagram. So how many messages are too many messages? As a general rule if you’re exchanging more than 50 messages a day with someone that friendship is probably skating the line of becoming inappropriate. Also, if you’re sending more messages a day to that friend than you are to your spouse. Or hacking Facebook messages. Basically, this person is taking up more of your time and thoughts. This is when the lines of a friendship can become blurred.
You Don’t Talk About Your Friend To Your Partner
My partner knows almost all of my friends. I talk about my friends, both male and female friends, all the time. But I found myself hesitant to talk about the online friend that I ended up having an emotional affair with. I wanted to keep that friendship secret and that should have been a red flag. If you find yourself making up excuses or lying to your partner about an online friend that’s a red flag that you are starting to cross the line. Also, if you feel guilt or shame when talking to or thinking about this person.
You Message At Odd Hours
Everyone exchanges messages and texts with friends throughout the day. But if you find yourself getting up extra early to message your online friend or staying up late at night to message them you are entering dangerous territory. And if you stay up all night messaging them but hide their messages from your partner you have definitely crossed the line into a full-on emotional affair. This is when things are really getting out of hand. You’re altering your life schedule to fit in this inappropriate online friendship turned emotional affair.
You Stop Talking To Your Partner
If you no longer talk to your partner about your day or ask them about their day, that’s a definite red flag. You should be telling your partner those things and not your friend. If you are not talking to your partner about your thoughts and feelings your primary relationship will start to fall apart. If you’re shunning your partner and turning to your online friendship you are in an emotional affair. If you enjoyed this, check out my last post about canvas painting.